Thursday, November 10, 2005

Your Nipples Are Sweating!

Since John and Mike are visiting us in the middle of their Alaska to South America bike trip, we took them to one of the shittiest places we could find that had karaoke. We ended up going to some place on Sunset and Gower. Shitty? Check. Karaoke? Check. With all the necessary components in place, we set about trying to get some songs in.

It was still early in the night, so I guess it wasn’t weird that an 8 year old girl was on stage singing “All That She Wants” by Ace Of Base at a shitty dive bar. She totally sucked though. I was embarrassed for her. "Stay in school little girl, or you really will have a baby just like the song says. Soon." Is what I told her as she got off stage. Just kidding. But I did throw my drink in her face.

I really wish I had brought a camera, but I managed to create pictures based on my recollection of the night.

Mike and Scott got a couple songs in to kick things off.

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Jeff sang “Power of Love”

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Shortly after Jeff’s blistering set, a group of British people on their vacation came in. There were four of them. Two guys, and two girls. The two girls were already out of their minds on something, as they stumbling all over the place. But apparently what they had wasn’t enough, because they rushed in and out of the bathroom 4 times before they even sat down.

They all sang a bunch of songs, the girls got more and more wasted. Finally resulting in them just jumping on stage and grabbing the mic from whoever was singing at the time to try to do some weird Christina Aguilera like vocal things, and when that got old they just screamed. They tried to do it to one lady as she was preparing to sing, but she just stopped them cold and said “Do not come on stage during my song”. It got real quiet. The lady on stage repeated herself sternly. It was a tense moment, as they stared each other down. Lady on the stage, eyes full of fury and rage. She’d had it with the antics of these two girls. Meanwhile the two girls, stood on the floor staring at her, mere inches away from the lady on stage. Chests heaving rapidly as their coke addled hearts struggled to survive, dangerously close to exploding. I should also add that they were really sweaty. Some dude in the back of the crowd noticed that one of the girl’s shirts had sweat stains underneath her breasts as well as her nipples. So, he kindly notified her. “Hey, blondie! Your nipples are sweating!”.

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Thankfully, that outburst cut the tension between the girls and the lady on the stage. Karaoke standoffs are probably the cause of most bar fights, as well as a signficant contributor to deaths among our age demographic, so it was nice to see violence avoided. I mean, there was an 8 year old girl in attendance.

I wish I had taken actual pictures. It would have been funnier to post the pics, rather than me try to re-tell the events. I fail at blogging.

Comments:
don't we all...i'm starting to hate my blog.
 
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