Thursday, December 22, 2005

The End Is Near..Nigh? Close?

As I sit here in my cubicle, amidst a sea of boxes and scattered paper I'm left with a very difficult decision. What should I take home with me?

I've got scripts upon scripts I could take home, but I've read them all and really once I've read a script...well you's been read. By me. So there's no real point in keeping it.

Should I take home my awesome "Panda Bear On Fire" drawing?
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Or maybe my generic football poster?
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I've got a Mr. Potato Head, but I think I'll leave that for the next person that is going to occupy this workspace.

I have a Kill Bill lighter I'm going to take because it was a rad gift. I'll probably also take an old vhs tape called "The Vortex: A Trilogy" which is a film some guy made that was the most awful thing I've ever seen in my life. I only have part one. I shudder to think that there might possibly be two more sequels to "The Vortex" that exist in this world.

Oh, I'm totally going to take what's left of my Office Duster. That thing is so rad. Did you know that the Office Duster can freeze water? Well, not a lot, but if you have some water left in a cup, and you stick the Office Duster straw in it and pull the trigger for a while. It freezes the water! Ok yeah, no one else was really amused when I ran around demonstrating it to people in the office. One guy had to totally harsh my mellow, by describing the science behind it. Look buddy. It's magic for all I'm concerened. Just let me run around like an idiot while I show people.

I don't know. I guess I'll just fill the box with whatever fits. Oh yeah I didn't mention that I get one of those boxes. You know the kind. Not too big, brown with the handles on the side. The box is in every movie where someone gets fired or laid off. It's like:

"Oh did you hear? Frank got laid off"

"What? No! He's been here for so long"

"Yeah I know-SHHH here he comes"

And then Frank comes around the corner, all his belongings reduced to whatever he can fit in the box. Maybe there's a fern sticking out, and some pictures of family.

Yeah, I've got one of those boxes.

congratulations on your box.
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