Monday, June 26, 2006

Question Of The Day

I often find myself watching nature shows whenever nothing else is on television. Something about the way they're shot, and the soft tone of the narrator draws me in.

I especially like it when it's a nature show depicting the savagery of animal attacks. You know you're on to something great when you see a hapless animal drinking by a water hole; you just know that fucker is going to be eaten in half by something large with teeth and claws.

Still, after watching animals attacking each other on nature shows for so many years, one question never gets answered for me..

Do other animals realize how bad it hurts to be kicked in the balls?

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We all know that a good swift kick to the balls will render any man, save for the eunuchs, in a world of white hot pain that can only be described as "Being Kicked In The Nuts". There's no other way to describe it, since getting kicked in the nuts is so high on the pain scale , the only way to describe it is to refer it to itself.

How come in nature shows, we never see any animals getting kicked in the testicles? If a Gazelle is furiously trying to escape the clutches of a Lion, wouldn't it make sense that if the Gazelle were given a chance, it might kick the Lion in the balls? Of course, this is assuming that Lion testicles, or any other animal's testicles hurt like human testicles when kicked.

Why wouldn't testicles across the animal kingdom hurt when kicked or punched? I mean, what if our testicles didn't hurt when someone kicked them or threw a baseball at them? Testicles are really important. If they didn't hurt like hell after some sort of trauma, like falling on a balance beam, then we'd be careless with our testicles. The pain is there to say "Hey man! Watch it! Precious cargo here!". So it would be logical that in order to make sure animals can mate, and produce offspring, their testicles have to be kept in working order. If other animals didn't experience the pain we do when getting smashed in the balls, who knows what kind of shenanigans they'll get their balls into, thus risking damage and the chance to produce any future offspring.

Photobucket - Video and Image Hosting

So, how come animals don't kick each other in the balls? Not only that, would knowing how bad it feels to be smacked in the nuts help us if we were being attacked by animals? Look at my friend Jeremy's dog.


See how big this dog's nuts are? Now, I know if a pit bull starts attacking me, I'm fucked, but if I somehow had my wits about me, and somehow found myself in a position to rock this dog in the nuts hard, then I should do it right? The pain would be so intense that the dog would have to take his teeth out of my neck, and roll into a little ball on the floor, while clutching his wounded testicles with his paws just like a human would do with his hands.

I should ask an expert, really....I mean, I don't want anyone to go out and kick the next dog they see in the balls just to find out what happens. Do I? No that's wrong, and mean...even if it is for science..


because in real life it is really hard to hit testicles, nature isnt daft if it were easy to get hit there then they would not be there. It is only because television depicts groin kicks that it is common knowledge now, before the 60's your average joe wouldn't know.

For example, a womans vulva is as sensitive as the testicles and since testicles are spongy and can absorb impact and also move out of the way while the vulva cant, in that sense, the vulva is more vulnerable and strong blunt impacts are actually more painful more woman then men.

ANYWAY, how many people actually know this? not many because vulva kicking isn't commonly shown on TV (but it is still shown especially in Japan) this is because of feminists trying to block these kinds of scenes.

So thats why, cos animals dont know generally - how would they? Like the sensitivity of the female vulva is little known except by many martial artists
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