Tuesday, July 25, 2006

Because it was so hot

I didn't go out and buy groceries, so now I'm fucking starving but it doesn't even matter because it's too goddamn hot to eat anyway.

Yesterday as I walked outside to get some food, cursing the sweltering heat, I saw someone sitting at a table under direct sunlight...eating a bowl of chili.
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What the fuck? Didn't this person know that it was at least 95 degrees, and humid outside? It's too hot for me inside with air conditioning on, and here's this guy chowing down gleefully on a spoonful of piping hot chili, outside, underneath the hateful eye of the sun.

Ughhh...I bet the chili was meat filled chili...spicy meat chili. I think that's what's offered at the new dining facility here at work. I wouldn't know actually, since I don't eat chili on hot ass days.

This really shouldn't bother me. Perhaps it's the heat and the sweat collecting on my forehead and upper lip that's turning me into a cranky person, but people shouldn't eat hot foods outside on hot days!

For your reference, I've compiled a list of foods that should not be eaten outside, under direct sunlight on hot days. These are merely suggestions. You eat what you want. I don't care. Even if it is ball's ass hot.:

1. Chili

2. Hot Pockets

3. Meatloaf

4. Anything with curry sauce

5. Garlic fries. Yes, even at the ballgame. No one wants to be around you as you shove garlic fries into your gaping maw, all the while you sweat out all the garlic to the dismay of everyone around you with working noses.

6. Fondue. Chocolate, or Cheese. It doesn't matter. Both bad.

This is a quick list. It's too hot to keep typing....

**Update to the list***
My friend Mike also suggested

7. Clam Chowder. Excellent suggestion. Clam Chowder definately should not be eaten under the sun on a hot day. Double minus points if it's Clam Chowder in a bowl made out of bread.

Scrambled eggs?
i hear u...lmao, chili on a hot day.....dang
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