Wednesday, March 07, 2007

Ask Me For Tips On Your First Date? Sure...

Don't be nice. But don't be a jerk. Be mysterious...

Move around her like a cat...stealth...

Perhaps grow a mustache and twirl it in your fingers while mulling things over going "hmmm" or "Hmmm vexing....truly vexing"

Wear a monocle, in fact, mimic what a rich old oil baron in the 30's would wear. Or, imagine yourself as a more dashing Dick Dastardly:

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If you take her to dinner, talk down to the waitstaff, or "help" as you "the Baron" would say, but then leave a generous tip..

Then after drinks, fight the man who insults your lady. After you put him on the ground with a well placed, well educated fist. Help the man up, give him cab fare and send him home to sleep off the liquor in his belly. This will show courage, and compassion.

You are the mysterious, yet compassionate rich oil baron of modern times, way before GQ magazine catches wind of the trend.

Good luck.



You ladies know you would want a guy like this. Don't lie.

Comments:
damn monocles get me every time.....
 
You forgot to mention that if the girl is prude, put a little something in her sprite to loosen her up, and if that doesn't work then turn to good 'ol Plan B: Rape.
 
who the hell is dick dastardly?! he kinda looks like waluigi. whenever we play mario party the computer always picks waluigi. i hate waluigi.
 
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